What’s your fantasy profession?

While traveling in a bus on Thursday night, I happened to eavesdrop on a steamy conversation between two chicks that were seated behind me. It all started when one chick told the other that she secretly wishes she were a professional stripper. Now that statement wiped the sleep right out of my eyes! I was itching to turn around and see if she was cut out for the job but I didn’t want to blow my cover lest they change the topic to less interesting discussions like shoes and handbags.

Unfortunately for the dudes, this post is not about my take on strippers. The point I’m actually trying to drive home is that we all have that one thing that they wish they could engage in. It doesn’t have to be naughty. I think even the folks that are happy with their jobs wish they could create time for some other activity. I have a pal who believes that if he ever got his hands on a golf club, it would not be long before Tiger Woods changes that intimidating name to Pussy Bush.

Another one sees himself being a hot-shot soccer coach despite the fact that he is currently pursuing a master’s degree in Architecture. Well this chick in the bus with me just wanted to strip-tease the hell out of men. She thought she had untapped stripping potential. You would be surprised to learn that Obama secretly wishes he were a bling-wearing hiphop artiste featuring in one of those dj Khaleed records.

As for me, I wish I were a renowned novelist. I wish I authored bestselling novels like the John Grishams and Robert Ludlums of this world. I wish I wrote books that dazzled readers around the world. The idea of writing came to me while I was jobless after I had just cleared campus. Feeling all inspired, I grabbed my laptop and started working on my best seller. Two hours later, I only had two paragraphs. I gave up and went to bed. Years later, it occurred to me that I could start small and the blog joeytales was born.

To date I have written 30 posts! I think that is a heck of an achievement. Every Sunday since late October (apart from the Christmas and Easter break) I have sat with a laptop and tried to get creative. It has become a ritual. Whenever I have an itching story, regardless of how I’m feeling, I can’t get in bed on a Sunday before writing it.

As I write this post, I’ve only had two hours of sleep in the last 36 hours. The 34 hours have been spent swimming, clubbing and driving/co-driving from a town 500kms away. I’m so tired my head feels like it has been exchanged with Kwach’s (dude has quite a massive head on him). But I still feel obliged to bang a few words. The truth is, I probably wouldn’t have gotten to my 30th post were it not for you guys.

When I decided that I was going to start writing I sought advice from a friend who already had a blog. I was however confused when he told me that he doesn’t write for the masses. The guy told me that he writes for his own personal fulfillment, and the fact that his blog gets few views doesn’t bother him in the least bit.

Well unlike my friend, I write for the masses. I write hoping that people get to identify with what I’m trying to say. That’s the reason at the end of each day I go to my wordpress dashboard to see how many people visited my blog. That’s why joeytales has a facebook fanpage and recently got onto twitter. If you are among those that come here every week, you are much appreciated. You are the reason this blog exists.

By the way, according to the stats on dashboard,  I’ve got quite a number of readers from Iceland who drop by every week. Apparently there’s an ambassador who is putting in a good word for me on that side of the globe. These guys are among my shadow readers. I tried provoking them on this post but I guess Icelanders just don’t like typing. Well it’s great to have you here folks.

There are many other shadow readers that drop by the site, read through the week’s post and leave quietly. There are those who leave anonymous comments. There are the shy ones that prefer contacting me directly through texts and emails. You are all much appreciated. Of course there are the outspoken ones that don’t shy away from airing their views: The likes of Nyambura, Sarah, Linda, thatguy, Mercy and Sikalily. Thank you for being bold and letting me know what you think… even if it’s pointing out writing mistakes.

If you have any observations or if you have something interesting to say, you can drop by my fanpage. You can also interact with me on twitter. Did I mention that joeytales is now on twitter? Twitter is defined as a micro-blogging application so it’s only fair joeytales goes micro when Monday seems too far way. If you are the shy kind and you don’t want people to see what you have to say, feel free to drop me an email on the address joeytales@gmail.com.

I might have digressed. This post was supposed to be about those things that we secretly wish we could do. I would like to hear from you guys. I would like to know what you are currently engaged in, and what you wish you could do. I swear I won’t judge – not even if you are a sadist and you secretly wish you were a hangman. I have a feeling my fan by the name thatguy secretly wishes he were a hairdresser.